And now comes the part where we all must heal.

I'll never forget the look on your face when you walked into my house that night.
It gets better. I promise.

Having a shitty life does not equal a get out of jail free card or a free pass to say whatever you want. It's not an excuse to be horrible to people. Shitty lives are supposed to be building blocks for something amazing. You're not supposed to let it eat you up or let it ruin the rest of your life. You're supposed to grow and come out stronger and make people say "wow". You're supposed to be an inspiration to those in the same situation as you. 

Don't succumb to the situation and become another statistic and don't use it as an excuse. 

 "When forced to work within a strict framework, the imagination is taxed to its utmost — and will produce its richest ideas. Given total freedom, the work is likely to sprawl." - T.S. Elliot 

Today i'm going to talk about something that i've never really thought about and is a little bit weird to me.

I've never really bothered to think about how many people actually support my photography.

I've never felt like they didn't support me or that i was worthless or no good at it or anything tragic like that- i just never really sat down and thought about how much my family and friends (and even distant relatives and STRANGERS) support me. 

Sure, a bunch of them look at my pictures, and sometimes like or comment. 

I even have a few regulars on my Flickr account that favorite my pictures- and they're total strangers! (aside from Baron and a few others that don't go on as often) 

I never sat down and thought about it until today. 

See, i entered a photography competition a little bit back and voting for it started today. I posted it to my photography page on Facebook and my personal account and was a bit taken aback by the response. Not only did my family share it to their Facebook walls (which was not a surprise) but a a guy i just recently met and a few of my friend's parents shared it too. Even a few of my parent's friends. It just keeps spreading. Not by the hundreds- but by about a dozen or so? 

It's all a bit bizarre to me. I never really thought about it. And i certainly wasn't expecting it. A few votes and my mom sharing it- perhaps. But not this. 

It's a pleasant surprise though.

:)

Of course, the last person i wanted to see....
God, help me not be bitter. 

You know what irks me?
Like, really gets under my skin?
When people assume that just because a boy is gay, that he is in love with every other boy on the planet. Or if a girl is a lesbian, she's obviously in love with every woman she sees.
That's like saying i, as a girl, am automatically in love with every male of my species that i happen to cross paths with. IT'S RIDICULOUS. People get so uncomfortable thinking "what if they like me".
Yes. They are attracted to your gender. Yes. They may find you nice to look at.
But how is that different than you catcalling at that girl. Or flirting with that boy?
You are just as creepy as you think they are. Society has just justified your feelings and actions as normal. I don't think gay is okay. But i don't hate people who identify as gay and i do my best to treat them as human beings. Because guess what? They ARE human beings. Just like you.
And so what if they do like you?
If they make advances that you find uncomfortable- ask them nicely to stop. Politely tell them you're not interested. Just like a girl turning down a boy she doesn't like.

A friend of mine once asked if two twin sisters who, as it turns out, are both lesbians, would be attracted to each other.
I said "That's like saying you must be attracted to your sister because she's a girl and you're a boy."
He understood my point and the conversation moved on, but it stuck with me.

Just because they're gay doesn't automatically mean that they're in love with you.

Just like because i'm straight doesn't automatically mean that i'm in love with a guy solely because he's a guy.

"Marry your best friend. I do not say that lightly. Really, truly find the strongest, happiest friendship in the person you fall in love with. Someone who speaks highly of you. Someone you can laugh with. The kind of laughs that make your belly ache, and your nose snort. The embarrassing, earnest, healing kind of laughs. Wit is important. Life is too short not to love someone who lets you be a fool with them. Make sure they are somebody who lets you cry, too. Despair will come. Find someone that you want to be there with you through those times. Most importantly, marry the one that makes passion, love, and madness combine and course through you. A love that will never dilute - even when the waters get deep, and dark."

- N’tima 

"I’m here. I love you. I don’t care if you need to stay up crying all night long, I will stay with you. There’s nothing you can ever do to lose my love. I will protect you until you die, and after your death I will still protect you. I am stronger than Depression and I am braver than Loneliness and nothing will ever exhaust me."

- Elizabeth GIlbert, Eat, Pray, Love